Argent the Super Poetry bus driver of the week has set a challenge Tunnel of (unrequited) Love/Excursion to the Comedy Store Check here
This is my entry as I hop on to the bus...
He said I Do
It was not for me
He said love you
Empathy whispered it’s not true
One bridesmaid was I
Was happy or was it a lie
She was my friend for life
He was the reason of my life
Elegant, neat he had a black bow tie
I chided and suppressed a sigh
Lavenders and tulips blossomed all around
Colors got lost, smile faded, grief profound
Toasts raised, cake cut served with sweet pies
He was oblivious of the love floating in my eyes
Shattered, I felt like a loner on seashore
Well, there goes one more
Searching & screening the ecstatic crowd
I saw many peas in the same pod
Sailing in the ship of Just Dumped, oh god
Cracked open a bottle, I sipped & slurped
Got drunk and waved
That free beer that cost my heart
Tell you what, finding a guy is an art
Snickering, Here I come, I said aloud
Winking I dived in to the crowd.
28 comments:
OMG this brings back so many memories where I have "seen" this happening. It's wonderfully painful and also rather wistfully ironic and funny in a slightly cruel way.
Really engaging writing :)
What a great poem - I love it! " saw many peas in the same pod
Sailing in the ship of Just Dumped, oh god" Brilliant!
Your poem really speaks of so much strong emotion. Unrequited love is no laughing matter.
@GM Thank you and Welcome...I saw this happening just in time to write it...Guess luck was on my side :)
@Argent Thanks for that Challenge...I tried some n I got the ticket...
@Heather..Thank you for dropping by...yep that was what I thought it would be...painful...
A fine and smoothly unfolding story we can relate to ...
what a powerful 3rd stanza!
You've got a ticket to ride ~ your piece is great.
Hmm, I've been at a couple of weddings where I had a thing for the bride!! The SS Just Dumped eh? Love it!
I really really like the ending on this - the happy wink and dive in - I remember that feeling well!!
Very nice and heart felt poem
@Dianne Welcome and Thank You...
@Helen Yeehaw!I sure got one...
@Peter Goulding Hush...that's so true, I can identify with you...been there ;)
*sob*sob* Just dumped...:D
@Niamh Thank you so much...Wicked...sometimes you realize sobbing is such a waste of time :)
that's the spirit!
@Poet in Residence...True that, It's all about Moving on..:)
Thank you for dropping by...
Go, girl! Nil desperandum, eh? Jump back in with both feet...
@Jinksy Bingo!You caught me there rightly...Seize the day ;)
Jinksy has already taken my intended comment, so can I just emphasise: feet first - you don't know what you're landing on.
@Dave Thank you for dropping by...
Well said...:)
I learn so much here...this is great...:)
On a lighter note: Hope I don't land on my heels...Ouch!:D
I love the zesty devil-may-care attitude after the melancholy. I don't know a better antidote.
@Enchanted Oak Thank you..hope it does work for everybody in reality...
ET, this is a country song just waiting to be sung! I love the line, "He was oblivious of the love floating in my eyes." Yes, I've been there for sure.
Loved it - the whole shape and drive, the lengthening lines and the glorious messy ending with the dive of hope. Some really memorable lines too. Good one!
@Jeanne Welcome and Thank you...I sure have picked at everybody's memories...:):)
@Titus Thank you so very much... Hope is all we have :)
Makes me wonder how many people feel this way at weddings! I certainly have, and you described the misery and the giddy resignation to a tee. :)
@Lydia Thank You...it's like grab them otherwise they'll be stolen in no time...n u have to go again on a searching spree :P
I endorse all these kind comments. In case the story of your poem was not an invention . . . best wishes for next time . . . might be Mr.Right!
@Doc Thank you and Thank you...:)
I need those wishes invention or not...You are very very wise to see the unseen...:)
This was a lot of fun! Sounds like the groom was a philanderer...
hey amazing piece of poetry!!
wow....
@Bug I m glad you enjoyed it :)
hmmm right he does sound like one...
@Devarshi Thank you so much buddy...
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